It is horribly terrifying in every sense possible. So many unanswered questions. So many questions that I will never be able to predict prior. Even making the plan is difficult. I have cancelled every plan I have made to hang out. What if they get fed up with me cancelling……
What if they judge me?
What if I try and they don’t?
What if they agree to hang out, have a bad time, then never want to hang out again even though I get attached?
What if they think I’m too fat to be a friend?
What if they think I’m not pretty enough to be a friend?
What if I have a panic attack and I start sweating profusely prior to excusing myself to the bathroom?
What if I’m left more lonely compared to how I feel sitting here alone?
………..what if it turns out fabulous and I make a friend for life?