I don’t know. The only thing I know is that maybe if I write then something will make sense. I want to write about every emotion feeling sensation image and see if I can get to an exile. I’m anxious. Constantly lately. Anytime I focus on my Self, anxiety is conquering the battlefield. And my… Continue reading Sort it out with Words?
I’m lost. I never added up. Suffocate to forget. Locked in my mind – Twist and turn. Instead, pain is amplified. Break free – need to breathe. Find a smile in my dream – Pain subtracted from My chosen state of mind. Let’s leave it all Behind.
After being so suicidal for so long, then finding the right medication and thriving, then being slammed down and suicidal again by a reaction to Tramadol…. followed by the joy of thriving again once Tramadol was out of my system. It’s been two weeks since my mind has been clear and stable again. That is… Continue reading Backsliding
Working ten hours a day equates extreme exhaustion – especially when you just go off six months of medical leave. I pushed myself too hard and now I spiral down. Ugh. My boss has expectations and I need my job to pay my mortgage and bills…. but F*CK! I am trying to be optimistic so… Continue reading Long Days
I woke up due to my boyfriends mothers boyfriend staying with me in my house. He got up and my dog went into a spaz of excitement.Anyways. Now I’m up. Now my mind is spinning with thoughts, plans, an agenda for the day, fears, hopes, concerns. I’ve tried music, drawing, reading – all for a… Continue reading The 5:04 AM Post