I can’t stop loving you. I am so unequivocally in love with you. And when I ask myself “why” I am left with the blessing of shame for not moving on as fast as you did. We loved each other very differently when we had our time. You lived in the fantasy world of optimism… Continue reading To Be Determined…
Internal Hope – Originally posted August 5th, 2017 I think of the word “hope” and I must admit, I have no idea how to put a definition on the word. And I use it all the time. Hell, within my first blog on this site, “My Personal Hell”, I referred to hope. In case you can’t… Continue reading Internal Hope
I haven’t been on here since February and it feels like just yesterday. It is incredible how so much heartache and so much growth can happen in a few short months. I’m still working through all my demons. Some days I am brilliant. Other days I pull myself out of bed. I’m still a little… Continue reading My Return
Do you ever need someone? The type of need that forces one last breath without their presence? Without them you know your lungs will collapse. As your chest rises and falls, you know within each tenth of a second how acutely aware you are that you cannot have them. Worse? The fact that you cannot do… Continue reading Without You
Beautiful mind, Lost and alone. The broken past, Chaos and control. Her heart of gold, Selfless and dull. My mystery ride, Inside and out, brings Self-discovery Untold. Quest for peace – the Tears and the pain Ache deep inside. Irrationality in control. String me along Until I fold. Question remains – Choose to live, in… Continue reading My Life
Working ten hours a day equates extreme exhaustion – especially when you just go off six months of medical leave. I pushed myself too hard and now I spiral down. Ugh. My boss has expectations and I need my job to pay my mortgage and bills…. but F*CK! I am trying to be optimistic so… Continue reading Long Days
“Striving for excellence motivates you; striving for perfection is demoralizing.” – Harriet Braiker Perfection and excellence are similar but are polarized; perfection is on one end of the spectrum and excellence balancing the teeter-totter far away on the other end. But what happens when you throw a huge metal wrench in the middle called depression?… Continue reading Perfection, Excellence… and Depression?