Sometimes I wonder what this life will bring next. I pulled myself out of bed today. I remember staring at the clock for over an hour thinking “just five more minutes”. Do you ever wonder WHY you got out of bed on certain days? I have no explanation for todays miracle, lol. I am still… Continue reading Day Nine – No Antipsychotics
Tag: suicide
Internal Hope
Internal Hope – Originally posted August 5th, 2017 I think of the word “hope” and I must admit, I have no idea how to put a definition on the word. And I use it all the time. Hell, within my first blog on this site, “My Personal Hell”, I referred to hope. In case you can’t… Continue reading Internal Hope
Alternative to Suicide
At church this last Sunday, the pastor told us a story about how a man walked into his office years ago and said he wanted to kill himself. The pastor asked him why and he was met with many reasons – recently divorced, financial issues, his job is stressful, etc. The pastor shared with us… Continue reading Alternative to Suicide
Limitless Tears
Have you ever just cried? Like REALLY let it all out? Maybe in the shower, looking up toward where the water is spraying your face so that no one can hear. Yesterday night and tonight have been my crying nights. My counselor tells me that it is therapeutic. I’m not sure. I always come out… Continue reading Limitless Tears
My Mind
“My Mind” – June 15, 2017 Smart mouth Head Spinning Silenced Whip lash ends Despair withdrawals Beg for You To calm my storm Paramount Recovery of hope. Demons retreat, Almost.
I guess I need a title?
I’m not sure what this post will be about. To be honest I’m confused and I just sat in the shower thinking that would clear the confusion? Since we are being honest.. I’m sad that I’m alone. I’m angry that my family is dysfunctional and I no longer fit into that dysfunctionalality where I was… Continue reading I guess I need a title?
Without You
Do you ever need someone? The type of need that forces one last breath without their presence? Without them you know your lungs will collapse. As your chest rises and falls, you know within each tenth of a second how acutely aware you are that you cannot have them. Worse? The fact that you cannot do… Continue reading Without You
Meditation Playlist
I recently learned that your mind can reach REM sleep easier when you fall asleep to relaxing natural sounds. Who the fuck knows if that is true. Quite honestly, I’m too lazy to Google it. Here is my sound logic: I won’t research this fun fact but I will react quickly and download the first… Continue reading Meditation Playlist
IFS: Worthy vs. Perfection
If you’ve read my blog titled Internal Family Systems then you’ll know that I’ve done a lot of work growing my self-worth leading me towards a Self driven life. Yesterday in therapy, we started talking about my job and the issues I have with my boss not holding others accountable when I escalate issues to him. Now… Continue reading IFS: Worthy vs. Perfection
Finding Happiness 