I had a very rough day. My body and brain are still trying to adjust to a rather crazy change in a mood stabilizer/SSRI and the side effects continue. Hallucinations, outbursts of crying, extreme depression and fatigue, and the occasional panic attack. It’s almost midnight and as I reflect back on today, I am grateful… Continue reading Finding Gratitude in the Dark
Category: psychosis
Learning to Love
It’s never easy to walk away, let her go. When you touched my heart, you could tell I was broken. Everything leads to – just walk away – but you love me. It will be okay. It will hurt. Bottoms up, tonight. Time can’t steal the love you’re born to find. Never easy but you’ll… Continue reading Learning to Love
This is me.
I have been struggling with the side effects of depresion and anxiety medications for a little over three years now. When I took a mental health genetics test through GeneSight it finally led us on the right path. However, no one could have guessed just how sensitive my system really is. I have tried over… Continue reading This is me.
Internal Hope
Internal Hope – Originally posted August 5th, 2017 I think of the word “hope” and I must admit, I have no idea how to put a definition on the word. And I use it all the time. Hell, within my first blog on this site, “My Personal Hell”, I referred to hope. In case you can’t… Continue reading Internal Hope
Working with High Functioning Anxiety
Hi friends. I had tried every online suggestion to manage anxiety prior to seeking medication. But the panic attacks. Excessive sweating. Debilitating worrying. The random striking of chest pain always continued. Is it wrong to speak up for this when at work? I feel like there is a fine line between your boss viewing you… Continue reading Working with High Functioning Anxiety
Mindfulness in Depression
Have you ever had a provider say to you “just breathe”…… AGHHGHG. Right? It is more complex than that! Like all my symptoms magically go away when I take a deep breath. If it were that simple then I wouldn’t be sitting in your office… Mastering mindfulness takes time. It took two years until I… Continue reading Mindfulness in Depression
Crying in Public
Does anyone else struggle with crying in public? I have no problem at ALL crying myself to sleep or in the shower. Both are when I am all alone. However, when I am in public… I will do everything possible to hold that pain in. What I have learned over 30 years is that pain… Continue reading Crying in Public
Internal Hope
I think of the word “hope” and I must admit, I have no idea how to put a definition on the word. And I use it all the time. Hell, within my first blog, “My Personal Hell”, I referred to hope. In case you can’t place a definition on the word, here you go: an optimistic… Continue reading Internal Hope
My Personal Hell
I’m a master at experiencing debilitating depression; to stand in front of a mirror aghast at the anxiety pouring out; to spend hours on the shower floor filled with sorrow and crying for no reason; trauma so severe that my world is turned upside down and everything is stolen from me; and the ultimate experience, to… Continue reading My Personal Hell
Mental Health Genetic Test
This test and its benefits aren’t widely known in my community so I find it imperative that others know there are options available in their treatment plan. Below is my story along with an overview of the test.: Treating conditions that affect mood, thinking, and behavior is difficult. Each person’s depression, anxiety, trauma, psychosis, bipolar,… Continue reading Mental Health Genetic Test
Finding Happiness 